To support our relationship, we started out having little check-ins in the evening. “How are you feeling?” “What’s up for you?” - that kind of thing. Sometimes if we were feeling generous one of us might give the other a massage. We soon recognised that some topics were harder to broach: asking for things, giving tough feedback, discontentedness, talking about sex. Over time we found that a little structure helped, and we began having turns at offering and asking for various things, and listening in silence.

Over the years our meetings evolved in different ways and helped us to get through some really tricky times. The simple structure helped us deepen in trust, to be honest, and to keep the relationship feeling dynamic.

We’ve called it YUM - You. Me. Us. - because, while it isn’t always easy, the longterm impact of tending to a relationship is to make that relationship YUM. Our hope is that YUM helps you break through the hustle-and-bustle, the resistance and the distance, to find each other once again in all your yumminess.

Emily & Sean.